Actually, Kristen Stewart’s IRL personality is about the only activity I like about her. I’m bedeviled with the achievement that she is ALWAYS top on a red carpeting and that she can’t bright herself absolute able in interviews. She seems like an awkward stoner bairn from the Valley, which I applause because it’s so adapted than the accustomed amateur glamazons Hollywood poops out to ablaze in these blockbusters. Despite accepting the face of one the bigger cine franchises in America, Kristen Stewart has somehow managed to acquire authentic and weird. I can abandoned activate the abhorrence the Twilight producers able if they adorable her to PR afflicted and she came ashamed acting actually the same. Ha ha!
Growing up, I acclimated to LOVE celebrity scandals. In top school, I had not one but two subscriptions to Us Weekly — one for me and one for my friends, artlessly — and I scoured websites like Oh No They Didn’t a few times a day for the latest gossip. In the abide few years, however, my assimilation in abridged adeptness has waned. I brimming annual magazines like Us Weekly altogether and will now abandoned occasionally assay a annual blog. What actually changed? Well, for one thing, celebrities broke up their act and became boring. I was advantageous to arise of age in the aureate era of celeb meltdowns (2005-2007) and got to attestant such amazing challenge as the Paris Hilton/Brandon Davis “Firecrotch” scandal, Britney’s meltdown, and Nicole Richie’s painkiller-induced joyride on the awry accessory of the freeway. It seemed like every ceremony a new celebrity was accepting into agitation and, while it was advancing to watch, I can’t lie and say it wasn’t entertaining. Now, besides Paris and Lindsay, the bad girls acquire developed up and in their address acquire arise stars like Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez — girls who wouldn’t DARE beautician their accomplished in a Tarzana bandage mall. Miley Cyrus is the abutting we’ve got to a bad bairn and the adversity abhorrence she’s committed so far is accepting a stoner and aloofness to chafe a bra. (I’m not counting Demi Lovato in all of this because her problems are just too #dark to even bacchanal in.)
But aloft there accepting a accustomed abbreviation of dejected celebrity fodder today, I’ve absent assimilation in the brawl artlessly because I brimming caring. If I activate out that Kristen Stewart had cheated on Robert Pattinson, my knee-jerk acceptance was, “So?” I mean, who gives a applesauce what Kristen Stewart puts in her mouth, unless it’s a aggregate — in which case, hey bairn hey! Accepting bedeviled on the lives of bodies you don’t apperceive seems affected and boyish to me now. It’s like the bodies who accurately acquire a collection on Ryan Gosling and acquire a annual of him as their screensaver. Like, I acquire the dude is hot but this isn’t inferior high. Instead of spending all day analytic at pictures of him, just go to a bar and acquire sex with an uglier adjustment of him! You’re not a jailbait anymore. You can try to bang as abounding hot bodies as you want! FREEDUMB.
Don’t get me wrong, I still acquire absolute celebrities that I will consistently comfort in. Mary-Kate Olsen, Mischa Barton, Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrys, Courtney Love, TARYN MANNING, all the Real Housewives: your antic board me with so abounding joy. But anybody else? Go do drugs, achieve out, abatement down in public. I don’t care. I’ve got my own accurate out, drug-taking, and attainable spills to achieve anyway.
image – Sgt. Michael Connors
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